Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Tuesday 2nd March..... Its 7pm and Im in bed... so tired even though I had a nap today I just get tired so easy these days and Im wondering has it got to do with carrying the baby or just emotionally drained??? Didnt have the energy or the mind to write in my blog last night. Still getting asked some pretty stupid questions... well stupid to me but of course people are kind of wondering what the hell is going on and I guess I cant blame them for that but its just exauhsting repeating myself so from now on it will be a case of REFER TO BLOG!!! The kids are settling back in to routine easily tho Tam does question me now and again about the baby and wether its back in my belly yet but she is young so I expect she wont quite get it. I have the hospital in the morning cant say Im looking forward to it but it has to be done and maybe they might have found some answer as to how long more I will hav to carry the baby before something can be done. I have some great friends that dont look for constant explanations and some of you that have the sense to just be there and not ask me constant questions but come on here for updates and it means a lot to me that ye do xx Hopefully Il get some sort of time frame tomorrow as to when this will end but the last couple of days I just cant shake the feeling they are waiting for my baby just to fall away to nothing inside me than say my only option will be a d&c and I wont even have a baby to bury at the end of this which is my nightmare its the only thing I could cling to all along was laying little Boo to rest... just have to wait and see now...

1 comment:

  1. oh ger, i hope you get some answers soon, typical of the laid back paddy rules of the lands....'Sure, we'll see what happens first....deal with it then', No one taking your emotional or mental health into consideration, during this wonderfull process of theirs.....like you say Ger, "in this day and age....", 21st century.......questions should not go unanswered, no matter how trivial it may seem to the professionals.....the answers matter, to you and alan, and the kids......you sound tired ger, please take the time to rest your body and mind, i hate to use these words, but i think you'll get me, when i say, there are a certain amount of toxins building up, therefore it will have an effect on your system, hormones being the most obvious change, just take the time to rest, and of course keep blogging, it will help to keep things clear. In the end Ger, little boo, is laid to rest in your heart and in your family's love already, why not plant a tree, as some sort of symbol, of life and nature......allow yourself the time to heal......my prayers and thoughts are with you all xxxx

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